During relationships, there always comes a time when the normal sexual routines become stale and a little too predictable. In these situations, especially within marriages, there’s a need for you and your partner’s sex life to take a detour, sometimes even a complete turnaround.
Sex toys are a great way to bring some unpredictability and spark to the bedroom as you and your partner try out new things. You may be wondering how to go about incorporating sex toys into the bedroom. Below is a complete guide on how to tread these new waters.
A guide to using sex toys with your partner
Ensure you’re both on board.
The use of sex toys, although it has now lost its stigma, is still a touchy subject for some people. So, it would serve you better to have a deep and broad conversation with your partner about wanting to introduce sex toys to the bedroom. Many people may feel embarrassed about approaching their partner concerning this subject.
This is normal as he/she may have some reservations about its use. Just be understanding about it, and it should go well. Even if you’re both pro-toy, it’s still important to discuss your safe sex practices so everyone feels secure and confident.
Go sex toy shopping together to build anticipation.
If you’re new to this practice, it’s a good idea to go out shopping for toys with your partner. During this process, you both follow your curiosities and familiarize yourselves with some luxurious sex toys brands that are available out there and what you like individually. This can be a surprisingly fun outing as you and your partner explore different aspects of your sexuality that were previously uncharted.
As you do this, your interests will both align and divert in incredible ways that will subtly double as kinky foreplay. Doing this shopping online will be quicker, but going directly to the shop will give a real feel of what you’re buying as salespeople will answer all your inquiries.
Time to get accustomed to your new tools
Now you and your partner have gotten the toys you both want, all that’s left is to know how to make use of them safely. You need to learn exactly how these toys work before you bring them into the bedroom.
Things like how you switch it off or on, how to decrease or increase the intensity, and the various patterns of vibration are all useful information to get before use. There’s nothing worse than being in the heat of the moment and switching off the toy instead of increasing intensity. Take some time to get acquainted with your new friend; there’s no rush.
Use toys on your whole body.
When it comes to sex toys that are usually used on the privates, people tend to be closed-minded about how to utilize them. It’s a good idea to avoid using your vibrator or dildo to explore your entire body, as it will feel like it’s running down your back or on your nipples.
This is a good way to understand how it feels before you start “using” it during bedroom play. If you start this way, ensure that you’re staying safe during certain types of activities. For example, in anal play, anything that goes up there should have a flared base, so it can always come out with no issues.
Discuss the experience afterward.
When using extra partners in the bedroom, it’s always good to keep a good line of communication with your other half. Keep exercising your right to discuss each other’s skills in bed after using the toy. This is a good way to keep everything clear and open while ensuring that both parties are always on the same page. Take the time to chat about the toy and reflect on what did and didn’t do it for you. Talking about your experiences will help you or your partner relax any remaining nerves.
In the best-case scenario, your introduction of sex toys into the bedroom has brought you and your partner new levels of pleasure. But it is important to note that you are still new to this and will need more practice using them with your partner. Try using it in different areas, at varying intensities; you never know what you may find. There are different types of lubes and arousal oils out there; don’t be scared to explore the possibilities.
Sex toys are a great way to bring a new dimension to sex life between partners, as long as you’re safe with them. Remember that you can only enjoy this as long as your partner is comfortable and willing. So, it is good to communicate with them and find out what hesitations or reservations they may have. Keep at it, and don’t give up; your higher levels of sensation and pleasure are just around the corner.
Lisa has a Bachelor’s of Science in Communication Arts. She is an experienced blogger who enjoys researching interesting facts, ideas, products, and other compelling concepts. In addition to writing, she likes photography and Photoshop.